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Photo: "Auto Auction" (Hobart, OK) by Weston Sewall |
1. more autistic comedians.
as i was laying in bed the other night, the public access channel was having some sort of community talent show which happened to be featuring a stand up comic with autism. no seriously. he was autistic. the jokes were, well, bad. and the delivery was... weird? but i couldnt get enough! dont get me wrong - i wasnt laughing at him because he was autistic, but i also wasnt laughing at the jokes. come to think of it, i wasnt laughing at all, really. but i was quite captivated. i turned the channel when the next act was a girl doing a remake of golddigger. that autistic comedian was way better.
2. pirate themed hotels.
i really want to see more pirate themed hotels.
3. people unexpectedly getting hit in the head with a flying object.
its like you see someone getting hit in the head once, and pretty soon thats all you think about and want.
4. more stories about pirates. see: #2. see, also: the hobart web issue i guest-edited a few months ago. see, also again: the fact that pirates are, well, killer. see, finally: actually, no need to see anything else. that's it.
5. bottle rockets and roman candles.
bottle rockets and roman candles should be standard issue, and i want to see more of them. i think the reason you cant find them outside of the indian reservations or nevada is because of #3.
6. wavepools
probably the greatest invention ever because if you time it right, your body becomes a submerged ICBM bent on the destruction of all in your path. its bowling for humans in a pool!
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